Friday, September 26, 2008

I should have known better!

i should have known better that i wasnt ready for this.
i should have known that this just wasnt me
i should have given myself time to know if this was truly what i wanted instead of allowing myself to be swept up in the moment.. now i regret.. i hate regretting.. but now i do... eventhough its a little.. i still do.

i let myself do what i have always been against... i dated a friend.
now i dont want to no more and i dont even know how to go about it..
after a month i started getting cold feet but i thought i could do it, so i ploughed on believing that it would get better with time and the feelings would dissipate and i would go back to liking him.. how was i to know that it was a crush and a crush it shall remain.. now that the crush is gone, what do i do?

if it was someone i was just acquaintances with, i could just tell him what i felt and it would be over, nothing do me.. but a friend? i keep considering his feelings and i dont know how to say anything and not sound selfish, unfeeling, wicked,hardhearted and all the cold words!

wahala part 2!

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Am i shallow or what?

OK this is not any lyrically rhyming poem but its an ode quite alright, an appreciation of the work of God and a little of man(grooming).
so many fine people in this life.. was never overwhelmed by fineness or beauty(whichever u choose) until i got to this town(JD,JAND,LONDON ETC). SO many fine brothers and am not even talking about the blacks, the mulattos are by far leading the race, closely followed by other Africans like the Sudanese(their coloring think), the brown people(people of Asia, India, Pakistan, the mixed ones,) even lil kids are so fine i feel like stealing one of each sex! God!!

am so obsessing right now!
life is good! being in the midst of such finery is good for the soul, no? lol

does that make me shallow? like seriously, everyone wants a fine boy on their arms or to call their own but constantly seeking?? does that make a person shallow? my friend says its OK to want a fine boy but if after sometime of being together and u cant see past his outer beauty then, u r indeed shallow! hmm.. at the rate am going i think that's going to be my fate! cos i don't see me capitulating to anything less than what i think is beautiful.. but where i also begin to think am not that shallow is that i have never dated an over the top fine guy.. people actually say that my ex is fine, he's handsome blah blah but i don't see it, i see all that is wrong with him instead.... is it that am too critical or is it that my standards are too high?? hmm...

Also, is it true that th older u get, u tend to lose all them tendencies to be lusting after fine boys and actually look for more meaningful things in guys??.. anyone?? if its true then i think i shud be rest assured that mine is not a problem but something that's going to go away sometime soon...

Seriously, apart from trying to be philosophical about this whole issue, who no like betta thing??

hey, and whats the deal with all the mariage talk nowadays?? i think if one of my mates should mention marriage in the same breath as a conversation, am going to scream!!!!

Sunday, September 7, 2008

howdy do!

its sunday!! yippeee.. am so excited the weekend is finally over! never been this happy before.. why this time? well when ure over the top bored, u begin to wish for time to just actually fly and for u to sleep less but wake up to a new day everytime you sleep for just 2 hrs!!

by tuesday i would finally be out of this place i so cant wait.. my own holidays would start.
would be going to the u.k but with all the rains, i don't know if am gonna have so much fun but its better than staying here where all my friends have gone to Nigeria or some other place for the summer holidays! sucks being alone.

just signed in to blogger and what do i see? blog reading list! u put up the blogs u are following.. really! blog reading list and the blog list on our blogs.. aren't they one and the same?? hmm this blogger sef, new new innovation everyday! i was about to start talking anyhow when i saw that my blog had a follower.. iyye!! hmm now am about to go pay back the favour and follow other people's blogs too!! lol

today is sunday,i think i have said that before, ok i have but am saying it for different reasons now.
today is sunday and though am not a Christian, its a day i do my own reflections, constant worshiping, listening to inspirational music and generally meditating and thanking God for another week.

so this sunday, i thank you God for bringing me to the end of my one week vigil.
by this time tomorrow, i would be putting my issh together and getting ready to go.. cant wait to see all my friends and my dad and sister... HAPPY SUNDAY PEOPLE!